Alicia

There is always time to care and end hate.

Concern depends on distance—we only care if its close. As all of us are passing out of adolescence a lot is less relevant, and for most, the daily crisis of a misunderstood youth is just a thing of the past. Memories wane, but emotions can last through adulthood and although times are more progressive and more adults are open about their sexuality the struggle still exists for them and youth to find acceptance. No, we can’t count on a kid create a podcast or multi-media campaign addressing bullying but we shouldn't anticipate them to handle victimization well alone either especially if they are questioning their sexuality.  Being removed from their age calls for the need of texts to offer support for GLBTQ dealing with bullying and allies that can benefit youth as well as adults because sometimes it's not enough to try to handle harassment alone. Songs that cause us to think, movies both fictional and non all contribute to building the confidence kids today need in order to face their toughest critics.

Emotion evoking music is common with most artists. Robin Thicke in particular is effective in gaining pathos with his song about unrequited love called "Would That Make U Love Me". It seems to be about two people, one more involved than the other in a hopeless-lover type scenario, however if you remove the lyrics from its original context, the song has a central theme of acceptance. Robin Thicke takes the listener through a host of scenarios some more ridiculous than others, starting with questions of what an individual needs to do to be loved and accepted. That could apply to any outlying individual within a community. It signified that any level of acceptance even if it’s in the most basic form as standing next to someone in public can be enough to make an individual feel less isolated. Anyone talking is better than no one talking and a child identifying as lesbian or gay may be able to relate to a need for belonging and seek conformity in order to find a companion. Within the song he offers up a host of suggestions in order to win the love of his significant other but as the interlude hits, the song takes a shift as he recognizes that change isn't what he needs in order to gain their attention. ‘If its just me and you, there’s no one else, would you see how much we’re the same’ is something he utters trying to reason, like many victims would with their bullies  or members of the in crowd because it’s not uncommon to find similarities between two individuals on opposite sides of a situation, especially like bullying. Reaching a common ground is something the song demonstrates effectively. The song is heavy in examples giving off  all these ways a person is willing to conform to be ‘maybe’ possibly enough to please another individual like changing their hair, the way they talk, religion, etc. and also uses reasoning and tone through the speakers desperation to please the one they love. Now, in a romantic context it may be sweet or whatever for a person to want to change to become everything they think you want, but from an individual standpoint it sounds ridiculous. ‘Dug down deep, to the bottom’  and ‘would you then be proud’ are two song quotes from Robin Thicke’s song that demonstrate the language within the song that host the speakers craving to please however after changing everything about themselves it may not even worth it. This song can be effective in educating a member of the GLBTQ community that conformity isn't necessary especially if it compromises who you are for what you think someone else expects out of you. It's okay to be different and stay true to who you are.

Patrick (left) reaches a breaking point where he decides that
he doesn't want his relationship to be a secret anymore.

A movie that was involved in GLBTQ bullying was Perks Of Being a Wallflower. The movie, based off of a book is sure to give more detail however the movie offered better visuals as to what two gay teens on different sides of popularity are perceived by their peers. The teens, Patrick (a central character) and Brad, his football, uber-masculine boyfriend who was embarrassed of his sexuality struggle to find acceptance within their different scenarios. Patrick is portrays a confident, showy homosexual that leave the audience to wonder believe that he’s comfortable with himself however it is revealed as a coping mechanism for not getting the love he desires. Patrick deals with literally being ‘Nobody’ as he’s nicknamed by his high school peers but has breaking points within the movie. Brad on the other hand wants nothing to do with homosexuality in public because of his fear of being stigmatized and often becomes a bystander when his friends/the jocks make fun of Patrick although he has nothing but affection when the two are alone in private. When Patrick and Brad are caught sleeping together by Brad’s dad, the dynamic of their relationship changed. Brad was beaten by his father only heightening Brad’s rejection of his sexuality. He lies to his friends about his bruises but Patrick overhears and wants Brad to tell them that his father tried to beat the homosexuality out of him. The idea seemed beneficial because Patrick is adamant on showing who you are and being yourself but it backfired. He was beaten as well, but this time by a group of brads friends and unsurprisingly brad did nothing about it. A key point of the movie and the situation between brad and Patrick is “you accept the love you think you deserve”—the difference between Patrick and Brad is that Patrick wouldn't settle for a closeted relationship from Brad whereas Brad, being taught that homosexuality is wrong, allowed his father to abuse him because he thinks that’s what he deserves. Due to the situations the audience becomes those dealing with homosexual relationships and its effective at showing the hardships that come along with having one out-ed partner and the other afraid to be themselves. Techniques that solidify the idea of accepting what you deserve include example, through the two types of boys dealing social acceptance differently, reasoning, because while one finds it logical to be out and help his partner out himself the other, brad, isn't ready to accept himself as being gay. Tones on anger, self-loathing, and frustration are seen within their situations and it establishes to viewers both positive and negative ways some choose to deal with harassment.

Alex (The Bully Project) internalizes his
feelings throught the film.

As a final source the documentary "The Bully Project" Directed by lee Hirsch was the most effective source on bullying for kids that are isolated because of appearance and sexuality. One main character the documentary follows is Alex, who puts up with a lot of his unhappiness which will only hurt him in the long run. Its obvious to see he hides his feelings because a kid complaining about how their treated would just be another reason for him to get picked on. He also shares that he doesn't really have friends to talk to period and the picture to the right reveals the tone of most of the movie--isolated and alone. His disposition is very sad, Alex clearly isn't very happy being isolated, his story reaches a lot of people, and it appeals to the audience's need for pathos like the other two sources.  Bully unlike Robin Thickes song and Perks didn't offer as much of an upside or comeback for our underdogs like Patrick in Perks of A Wallflower or the main subject of Robin Thicke's song who'd rather let their lover/friend see their similarities rather than change themselves. However Bully gave viewers a shock therapy kind of perspective on the actuality of kids being bullied. Taking us through the lives of kids like Alex and other examples pathos was a huge component because viewers can't help but sympathize for the kids socially cast aside. Better than Perks of a Wallflower, it takes you into cultural contexts experienced early on, with real life bullies and victims.  A common theme within all three mediums is the presence of insecurity. Robin Thicke's subject is straight forward with how uncomfortable he is with the situation at hand, along with the kids in bully as well as Patrick in Perks of a Wallflower. However each differs in the way that insecurity is handled--through reasoning, though acceptance and maybe not reform, and blatant retaliation respectively all three demonstrate that bullying or mistreatment can have different impacts and pose different results. Now, Bully has a larger amount of examples to relate to different types of children facing similar situations but its use of pathos is what sets it apart. It offers emotional appeal that brings the audience's attention to the fact that bullying is a real problem. The tones differ as well from the heartbreak denial brings in "Would That Make U Love Me" to the retaliation in Perks of a Wallflower to Bully offering up attitudes of grief. But if looked at collectively, all three contain a sense that change must occur.

Works Cited

Chbosky, Stephen, dir. The Perks Of Being A Wallflower. 2012. Film. 19 Mar 2013.
Hirsch, Lee, dir. The Bully Project. 2011. Film. 19 Mar 2013.
Thicke, Robin, perf. Would That Make You Love Me. 2006. Web. 21 Mar 2013.